Thank you! Thank you!
Lieutenant Willow Rosenberg raced through her apartment, phone balancing between her ear and shoulder, while she searched for her second shoe. She couldn’t believe her luck! Her prayers had been answered.
“I’m really sorry, Rosenberg,” Kawalsky said, sounding genuinely disappointed. “I know this isn’t how you wanted to spend the holidays.”
Damn, no shoe under the bed. “It’s okay, sir, really.” Willow had to do her best to sound disappointed, she didn’t want him to hear how happy she was they were being called into work. “Can I ask what the mission is, sir? All teams are on stand-down through Christmas.”
“Jacob’s buddies need us to help them find one of their operatives,” he explained. “Since none of us are married, we got the short end of the straw.”
A mission with the Tok’ra? They were never good, but hey, she was desperate enough to take anything. “I’m guessing that the General knew there was a chance this mission would come up, since he asked us not to drink on or before Christmas?”
There was a slight hesitation in Kawalsky’s voice before he answered, “Yeah, Jacob hinted that they were up to something. The General sends his apologies by the way.”
There was really no need to apologize. In fact, Willow had to stop herself from ringing the General to thank him. If there was one day of the year Willow wanted, no, needed to work, it was this one.
This was one of THE days – the Key Days, as she liked to call them.
It was a day when her memories of the past were impossible to ignore. It was a day where something happened, good or bad, that she couldn’t forget. There were only a handful of them through the year, but each was painful in its own way.
This day, December 25, was painful because it reminded her of Oz and Xander. With Oz, it was a reminder of the first night the two of them had spent together. With Xander, it was because… well, because of the Snoopy Dance.
And Willow thanked anyone listening that she was now working.
She had all but begged Colonel O’Neill and General Hammond to allow her to work, but the General had insisted SR-1 take time off. The last month had been their worst so far, with missions that gave birth to new and improved nightmares, and the team, Hammond had said, needed a break.
A break, to Willow, meant no escape from her memories. Which, she was pretty sure, the General and Colonel knew. When she had approached the General, asking him to let her work instead of people with families, she had seen sympathy in his eyes. He KNEW why she wanted to work, but he wouldn’t allow it.
No work, no escape.
And, for most of today, she hadn’t been able to escape, especially since the General ordered her not to drink. She had spent the morning staring at the black television screen, out the window, at the worn photograph of her friends she only pulled out on special occasions.
If Willow couldn’t work on a Key Day, she had to be alone. She didn’t like anyone to be around her. For her, the saying misery loved company wasn’t true. Which was why she had lied to her team when they had asked her what her plans were for the holidays.
Even though she had only been a member of the team for six month, they were close. Fighting side by side had formed a strong bond between them, and Willow was a little worried they would try to convince her to spend the day with one of them if she said she was alone.
So, since she had told them months ago she had converted to Christianity to explain all the crosses in her apartment, saying she was raised Jewish wouldn’t cut it. The only way Willow could avoid them today was by telling them that –
“Oh, and the General said that he’d reimburse your friends the cost of their flight here, since you’ve been called in.”
– her friends were spending Christmas day with her. It had been the only thing she could come up with on short notice. “Actually, sir, that won’t be necessary.” She cringed slightly. “My friends had an urgent case, they couldn’t come out.”
“Really?”
She couldn’t tell if he was surprised by her announcement or not. “I was actually going to give Grogan a ring,” she lied, “to see if he wanted to come around tonight after dinner with his family.” Oh, what tangled webs…
“Well, that won’t be necessary anymore.”
No, it wouldn’t. “I’ll be leaving now, sir,” she announced, holding up her missing shoe in silent triumph. “I’ll be at the base in fifteen.”
“Actually, Rosenberg, can you swing by and pick me up on the way through? My car’s in the shop.”
What? The request was the last thing she expected. Kawalsky NEVER asked for a ride. “You want me to give you a ride?” On her bike?
“With Hayes flying in from LA and Grogan on his way back from his parent’s, you’re the closest.” He sighed. “It’s a damn good thing I didn’t leave for Jack’s place early like I’d planned.”
She felt guilty at the mention of her teammates. While working today was a blessing for her, to them it was probably a curse. Her elation lessened.
“Rosenberg, you there?”
“Yes, sir, I’m here, and yes, I’ll give you a lift to the base.”
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Willow pressed the horn again and waited, shaking. Even after seven years in Colorado, she still couldn’t get used to the winters. She was freezing her ass off waiting for Kawalsky. Where was he?
“Damn it,” she muttered and switched off her bike. It wasn’t like Kawalsky to leave her waiting like this. Maybe he was on the phone to the Colonel, explaining why he couldn’t go to dinner. Whatever the reason, Willow couldn’t stand being outside any longer.
She marched up to his front door and knocked loudly. She listened carefully, there was movement inside and… laughing?
The door flew open. “Rosenberg!” Kawalsky greeted her with a beaming smile. “So nice of you to make it.”
“Sir?” Willow stared at her C.O. in confusion. For someone who sounded so disappointed less than twenty minutes ago, he seemed in high spirits, jovial even. “I’ve been sitting outside for the last five… Are you holding a beer?”
He looked down at his beer and jumped in mock surprise. “Why yes, Rosenberg, I am holding a beer. I knew General Hammond had good reason to recruit you.” He rolled his eyes. “Now get your ass inside before you freeze it off, that’s an order.”
“But sir,” she protested as she followed him inside. “The General ordered…” Her words fell away when she reached the kitchen.
Inside the kitchen was Grogan and Captain Hayes – both of them with the same grin Kawalsky had.
Why did she get the feeling she had just been had? “I thought we were being called in for a mission with the Tok’ra?” she asked cautiously, not sure she really wanted the answer. There was food all over the kitchen counter, the table she passed in the dining room had settings for four people. She already had the answers that she needed right in front of her, but her mind refused to believe them. “Aren’t we supposed to be finding a missing Tok’ra operative?”
Grogan pulled a beer out of the fridge and handed it to her. “Rosenberg, the only thing we have to find are the napkins.”
Hayes snorted with laughter.
Her heart filled with dread and her stomach with butterflies. “There’s no mission.” It wasn’t a question.
“Unless you consider eating until you want to throw up a mission? No, there’s not,” Kawalsky said, motioning for her to sit down.
This… this was bad.
VERY bad.
Today was a Key Day, a day when she needed to be away from anyone who knew her or was remotely close to her. “Sirs, I don’t understand. You’re supposed to be having dinner with your families.” Or, in Kawalsky’s case, SG-1.
“Just like you were with yours?”
The dread went from her heart right down to the pit of her stomach. They knew she had lied.
“For future reference, Rosenberg,” Kawalsky began, his face not so jovial. ”When you decide to lie in front of a group of people, try not to LOOK like you’re lying. Everyone standing with us at the party saw through your bullshit.”
“And, after making said announcement, you should ask the General to work,” Hayes added.
Willow closed her eyes. That meant SG-1 knew she had lied, they had been standing with Kawalsky and the rest of her team… along with the General. God, she was so incredibly stupid! “But I still don’t understand, you’re supposed to be with your families.” She tried to wrap her mind around it. She couldn’t understand why they would do this. “You planned all this so I wouldn’t be alone at Christmas?”
“Yep.” Grogan grinned proudly. “We figured you wouldn’t come here voluntarily, so we made you think it was a mission. It was Dr Jackson’s idea actually, well, the phony mission anyway. Apparently Colonel O’Neill did something similar to Dr J his first Christmas back on Earth.”
Dr Jackson? Her heart thudded at the mention of his name. At least this kind of explained why she had been seeing him watching her more than usual.
“Colonel O’Neill helped as well, he asked the General to order you not to drink,” Hayes stated, taking a sip of his beer.
Dr Jackson, Colonel O’Neill, and General Hammond were involved in this? The feeling of dread solidified in her stomach. All three of them knew about the Sunnydale Massacre – so did her team. “I can’t believe you did this.”
Kawalsky smiled and took a sip of his beer. “I can’t believe you thought we wouldn’t.”
To be honest, the thought had never entered her mind. Yes, SR-1 were close, but she didn’t think they were THAT close. Not so close that they would spent Christmas with her instead of their families.
Willow didn’t think they were… that they were friends.
“We’re a team Rosenberg, you should have known we’d be here for you,” Kawalsky told her. Then, to her surprise, he reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. “The battles we face aren’t always in the field. This time of year must be rough. We thought we’d give you some back up.”
Willow quickly turned away as tear stung her eyes. This was something Buffy and Xander would have done. It blew her mind. It was something her friends in LA would have done too, but… She never expected it from SR-1.
Willow turned back to her team, looking at them in a new light. Since she had joined the Air Force, Willow had spent an inordinate amount of energy keeping people from getting to close her. These three men were the first people to ever get past her defenses and… She kind of didn’t mind.
It wasn’t until this very moment that she realized how much she didn’t want to be alone, how much she missed having friends that cared THIS much. “I, ah, don’t know what to say.” She wasn’t sure she deserved this, but she was surprised to discover couldn’t could turn away from them.
Not that they would have let her, anyway. They were probably the most stubborn pains in the ass she had ever met. They wouldn’t let her stand alone, just like she wouldn’t let them.
“Don’t say anything,” Kawalsky said. “Just drink, eat, and have fun.”
“And open presents.” Grogan pointed to the tree. “Did we tell you that the SG teams pitch their money together and buy presents for the S&R teams? We all have gifts looking suspiciously like bottles of alcohol.”
Willow returned Grogan’s grin and reached for her beer. As she drank, she felt the tension ease out of her. Looking at the men sitting around the table, Willow knew solitude wasn’t the thing she needed today.
What she needed was unity, the kind that only her team could give her.